For a guy who has been brought up in a household of women.
And as a person privileged to have been in a relationship with women who were
or are equals, if not better; I am having trouble processing the plethora of
sexual harassment conversations over the last 3 -4 days.
Sexual harassment is a dark reality, so I am not naïve enough
to be surprised by its mention. What has stumped me is that it has happened to
and with people who I have known. People I was in the same room with during my
professional life. People like AIB who I found to be a leading (comic) voice on
things that ail our society. People like Vikas Bahl, who I admired as a
professional and then was in awe of, for the creative work Phantom did. And a
few of the Indian advertising professionals, some of whom I have had a drink
with.
My proximity to these
individuals and my inability to process their creepy behavior is what has
confounded me.
But I have realized that Weinstein, Brock Turner, Khamba,
Bahl and these advertising professionals under investigation have one thing in
common – power. The power to influence people’s lives, careers that allows them
to develop a sub-conscious impression that they will get away with it. The
power to sit in me and make lewd comments about a woman’s clothing without fear
of consequence. Power to masturbate in a female colleague’s room, without worrying
about the damage to their reputation.
They build this power because there are bystanders who at
best, say nothing. And who, at worst encourage this kind of behavior as a crude
“male buddy” joke. They build this power due to inaction.
Silence – driven by fear of harm or embarrassment. Or encouragement
– driven by embarrassment or servitude has a role to play in encouraging these
monsters.
And so I will do what I can. Based on principles of speaking
out and discouraging, these are changes I will make:-
1.
I will clinically and conclusively shut down conversations
that shame or disrespect women – irrespective of their profession or social status;
during and especially in social gatherings.
2.
As a professional, I will use any authority I have
to dissociate with any vendor whose organization has been accused of sexual
harassment incidents within my purview of work.
3.
I will refuse to work for an organization that
does not swiftly and decisively deal with sexual harassment incidents.
4.
I will not tolerate a professional conversation
that involves me, where comments made about women cross the border of
professional courtesy.
5.
Finally, I will boycott entertainers who are proven
guilty of sexual harassment. As much as I love AIB, Louis CK, the films that Weinstein made; I will not let their
brand of work get my money.
Every individual has the power to deal with sexual harassment
in their own way. This is my way.
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